Do you want children?
I don't understand the selfish types like you who want their partner to carry baby.Guest wrote:Willing to have one. Willing to date a partner with one. Prefer that neither of us have any until it's time to start our family, at which time my partner would carry ideally. Cant do more than 2 in my household though.
I think so. I really like kids, and the idea of being a mother at some point sounds appealing to me.
That being said, I'm not looking to rush. I'm only 22 right now. I have some straight female friends who keep saying "they're running out of time!!" and I'm honestly confused.... Truthfully, giving birth doesn't sound that appealing to me lol. I'm not against it but I think I'd sooner adopt unless my wife wanted to get pregnant, then I'd be fine with that.
That being said, I'm not looking to rush. I'm only 22 right now. I have some straight female friends who keep saying "they're running out of time!!" and I'm honestly confused.... Truthfully, giving birth doesn't sound that appealing to me lol. I'm not against it but I think I'd sooner adopt unless my wife wanted to get pregnant, then I'd be fine with that.
I don't mind kids but I've never wanted my own and I'm glad my gf doesn't want any either. While I was growing up I spent a lot of my life taking care of a family member so I have no interest in spending so much of my energy care taking someone else again unless I absolutely have to.
Maybe further down the line we'd be open to fostering.
Maybe further down the line we'd be open to fostering.
I've never really wanted one and don't have that urge to be a mom at all. But as I've gotten older I've figured it's probably not the worst thing in the world and adoption is something I'd be willing to consider if my partner really wanted a child.
I feel like the biggest issue for me right now is, that this world is a terrible place. Us and our previous generations have really fucked everything up. Social media is something that I find more bad than good and looking from a childs perspective it also allows so many ways for kids to torment and bully eachother.
We're using all the resourses this earth has to offer and basically leaving a shithole behind where the generations after us will be the ones that suffer. I mean I'm in my 30's so I'm pretty sure I'll see some of the disaster we're headed for.
So no, I don't think deliberately having a child into this world is something I could do with a clear consience (because I feel like I'd be bringing them into a world that's falling apart) and even adopting seems a little scary in that same perspective.
I feel like the biggest issue for me right now is, that this world is a terrible place. Us and our previous generations have really fucked everything up. Social media is something that I find more bad than good and looking from a childs perspective it also allows so many ways for kids to torment and bully eachother.
We're using all the resourses this earth has to offer and basically leaving a shithole behind where the generations after us will be the ones that suffer. I mean I'm in my 30's so I'm pretty sure I'll see some of the disaster we're headed for.
So no, I don't think deliberately having a child into this world is something I could do with a clear consience (because I feel like I'd be bringing them into a world that's falling apart) and even adopting seems a little scary in that same perspective.
x2Guest wrote:I like kids, but I wouldn't want to birth one.
If ever I feel like I can bear the responsibility of having a huge influence on an another person's development, I still think I wouldn't birth one myself. I would prefer to adopt, for personal ethic reasons.
I wouldnt ever want to be pregnant and i cant really see myself changing my mind i that regard.
And since having children is not my main priority and i would never ever force my partner to carry it just because i dont want to, i think i would go for adoption as well.
Lol, no thanks. I rather be the cool aunt,which I already am. I know that kids have a lot of behavioural problems because they don't really know to control their emotions which is why they have so many tantrums and ain't nobody got the patience and time to correct that. Also I see my siblings have no social life, are always tired and pretty much have lost their looks. Also having a teenage daughter/son must be a nightmare I rather never now.
I conclusion, I rather have a pet.
I conclusion, I rather have a pet.
Yes. I'd love to have maybe 3 or 4. I'd love to have a big family especially around Christmas time with all the chaos it would bring! I think because I'm an only child and so is my mum so I have a very small, close family.
My gf and I have already discussed having children. She has already said that she wants to carry but use my eggs for health reasons, which I'm fine with.
We are both 31 so ideally within the next 12 months or so we might have a little one on the way
My gf and I have already discussed having children. She has already said that she wants to carry but use my eggs for health reasons, which I'm fine with.
We are both 31 so ideally within the next 12 months or so we might have a little one on the way
Guest wrote:Lol, no thanks. I rather be the cool aunt,which I already am. I know that kids have a lot of behavioural problems because they don't really know to control their emotions which is why they have so many tantrums and ain't nobody got the patience and time to correct that. Also I see my siblings have no social life, are always tired and pretty much have lost their looks. Plus, having a teenage daughter/son must be a nightmare I rather never know about.
In conclusion, I rather have a pet.
Always said no. But now I'm approaching the age when I will no longer be able to naturally I'm starting to think about it differently. I was quite content with my decision when it felt like something which I was actively choosing in the moment. But that it will one day be an irreversible reality is beginning to dawn now. I imagine the regret of not having biological children is really quite something to live with.
Adopt.Guest wrote:Always said no. But now I'm approaching the age when I will no longer be able to naturally I'm starting to think about it differently. I was quite content with my decision when it felt like something which I was actively choosing in the moment. But that it will one day be an irreversible reality is beginning to dawn now. I imagine the regret of not having biological children is really quite something to live with.
I don't know. My sister had a baby and he is now 6 years old so I got to see what it's like to raise a child. I really don't like infants. At age 4 they're okay, but from age 0-3 I really don't know what to do with them.
I see both the good sides and the bad. I think the love you have for your child is something that cannot be matched with anything else. But I don't know if I ever want to take on such a big commitment and if I want to sacrifice so much of my own life.
I see both the good sides and the bad. I think the love you have for your child is something that cannot be matched with anything else. But I don't know if I ever want to take on such a big commitment and if I want to sacrifice so much of my own life.
18 years of your life...Guest wrote:I don't know. My sister had a baby and he is now 6 years old so I got to see what it's like to raise a child. I really don't like infants. At age 4 they're okay, but from age 0-3 I really don't know what to do with them.
I see both the good sides and the bad. I think the love you have for your child is something that cannot be matched with anything else. But I don't know if I ever want to take on such a big commitment and if I want to sacrifice so much of my own life.
No, because:
-I would do nothing but worry about them
-The world is becoming a more difficult place to thrive
-Natural resources are more finite than we think
-I'm still fighting for things that I want from life
-I'll always be partially "nurturing myself" due to neglect as a child
There's no real purpose to having kids in this era, unless you have a family owned biz and need free labor, or if you think you can convince them to take care of you when you're dying. I love encouraging and helping kids though, through volunteer work.
-I would do nothing but worry about them
-The world is becoming a more difficult place to thrive
-Natural resources are more finite than we think
-I'm still fighting for things that I want from life
-I'll always be partially "nurturing myself" due to neglect as a child
There's no real purpose to having kids in this era, unless you have a family owned biz and need free labor, or if you think you can convince them to take care of you when you're dying. I love encouraging and helping kids though, through volunteer work.
It actually never ends. I've known elderly people who are still entangled in the problems of, and are having to throw money at, their middle-aged kids. It's not uncommon and is becoming more common. And if you're kid turns out to be an addict or have major medical issues? Forget it. That's becoming more prevalent as well.Guest wrote:18 years of your life...Guest wrote:I don't know. My sister had a baby and he is now 6 years old so I got to see what it's like to raise a child. I really don't like infants. At age 4 they're okay, but from age 0-3 I really don't know what to do with them.
I see both the good sides and the bad. I think the love you have for your child is something that cannot be matched with anything else. But I don't know if I ever want to take on such a big commitment and if I want to sacrifice so much of my own life.
Seems to me that the majority of people in this thread don't want to have kids. Ask the same to straight women and you will have less no as anwers. Seeing it from a different pov makes you see things in perspective since having kids is not just a life goal, it's a huge responsibility you should think about and commit if you really want it or not have it at all.Guest wrote:Why are people in this thread actively trying to convince others not to have kids? If you don't want any that's fine but what does that have to do with the next lesbian?
It's a conversation with some clashing views. Deal with it. There's no "trying to convince" if someone has already made up their mind anyway.Guest wrote:Why are people in this thread actively trying to convince others not to have kids? If you don't want any that's fine but what does that have to do with the next lesbian?
I'm nearly 40 and regret nothing.Guest wrote:Always said no. But now I'm approaching the age when I will no longer be able to naturally I'm starting to think about it differently. I was quite content with my decision when it felt like something which I was actively choosing in the moment. But that it will one day be an irreversible reality is beginning to dawn now. I imagine the regret of not having biological children is really quite something to live with.
Here where i live you can have medical care for free from the state, but it usually takes months to have an appointment, so if you need to do some exam or check up the day you want, you need to pay a ticket. I remember when i was 12 my mom needed money because her leg was hurting and swollen, it costed something like 70 E to go to the doctor and check it but one of my older siblings needed money for his books so my mom gave the money to him and she didn't go to the doctor asap as she should have. Things got worse and she managed to go to the doctor a month later, but the doctor told her that the leg problem could have been solved before and with less permanent consequences if she only had gone before.
Moral of the story is i love my health too much and don't want to spend my money on ungrateful kids.
Moral of the story is i love my health too much and don't want to spend my money on ungrateful kids.
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