Guest wrote: ↑13 Oct 2022, 07:11
Guest wrote: ↑13 Oct 2022, 00:15
I do not get pleasure from fingering. It hurts. If I do it or if my gf does it. I can only come if I rub it myself. Like rubbing above but the fingers not entering. Also my clit is hidden really well. It there something wrong with my pussy? Also my gf gave oral for hours and couldnt come.. Am I broken?
You could have performance anxiety, often attributed to men. But women can suffer from it as well. "First, let's look at what physically happens in a woman's body when she is experiencing performance anxiety. WebMD explains that anxiety "causes your body to launch a response called 'fight or flight.'" When sexual acts result in you feeling stressed or anxious, your body releases stress hormones — epinephrine and norepinephrine — that are actually meant to ready your body to hide from or face a threat.
In this case,the threat to your body's well being is the fear of displeasing your partner (of if there is trauma involved, the fear of physical intimacy).
A few different things can happen once these stress hormones take hold: 1) It is difficult to get wet enough for intercourse. 2) Vaginal muscles tense up, making penetration difficult or impossible. 3) You won't have any desire to engage in sex.
Now, let's take a look at some of the mental and emotional things that happen to a woman when she is experiencing performance anxiety.
Morse says, "It can be seen in a woman feeling disinterested in sex altogether — why would anyone want to regularly partake in an activity in which they feel consistently inadequate?
Many women withdraw and make excuses to avoid having sex to avoid these anxious feelings and perhaps convince herself that she just 'isn’t that sexual of a person.'
Maybe she would be if the priority was on her pleasure versus her performance." And typically, a woman is considered "good in bed" if she moans and achieves the kind of orgasm we see in the media — a performance that many women feel pressured to fake.
Morse continues, "Instead of being in the moment with her partner, connecting sexually and being in tune with her body (all things that can enhance sexual satisfaction and actually help her reach climax), she is worrying about whether or not she will ever finish."
What Causes Performance Anxiety In Women?
75 percent of women are unable to achieve orgasm from penetration alone, according to research from Emory University. Some women can only orgasm from masturbation, Dr. Caudle explains. When explosive, loud, dramatic orgasm by women is what media and pornography teaches us to be the sign of "good sex," there is immense pressure on women to achieve that kind of orgasm — despite the fact, as Dr. Caudle emphatically reminds us, "Porn isn't real."
Morse elaborates on the disconnection that a woman can feel after sex. "She barely remembers what positions they did or how it felt because all she can think about it that bright shiny orgasm that she once again failed to achieve... A lot of women fall into this trap of believing that it is the other persons responsibility to bring home the orgasm.
So when their partner is doing various moves and nothing is happening for a woman , she immediately becomes anxious and starts to assign the blame to herself and her sexual response.In addition to concerns over orgasms, as explained by the Huffington Post, "Body image issues, orgasm obstacles and STD worries are just a few of the concerns that can keep women from letting go and enjoying their time between the sheets. Women dealing with performance anxiety "are often worried about something," says Dr. Caudle.
Women are already taught to be ashamed of any "flaw" on their body even when it's covered up by clothing. So, as Dr. Caudle explains, "Being naked feels extremely vulnerable." Women are socialized to fear and/or hate the appearance of their vulva and labia, and many grown women admit to being too anxious to have ever looked at it in the mirror. So imagine the anxiety that would accompany another person viewing their genitals.
Dr. Caudle continues, "I definitely think the societal hype about sex makes it hard for so many people. Society tells us how to look, what is sexy and what is not, what is good sex, what is considered attractive or not. All these rules make it harder for people to be intimate in a way that makes sense for them. Besides body image issues, says Dr. Caudle, "Difficulties in the relationship can cause anxiety. When you're not in tune with your partner from an emotional or psychological standpoint, intimacy and confidence can suffer.”
What Can Help You Overcome It?
https://www.bustle.com/articles/136466- ... -for-women